Poem #16 of 30: Never mind

Never Mind

My mother uses these words to
Push me away
To deny my word
Over her own
Stubborn

I argued with her the other day
And told her it wasn’t okay
To speak to any of us with
The demeanor
Of what everyone says is
“Just the way she is”
“Never mind” she said
I told her it wasn’t okay
To raise her voice
And shut out the voice of others
“Never mind” she said
I told her she wasn’t listening to me
“Never mind” she said
I told her I wouldn’t “never mind”
That she never gave me
A chance to say what others
Would not say
“Never mind” she said
I told her she never listens
“Never mind” she said
I told her she made me so angry

And she said nothing
I paused
And took a deep inhale
Looking at my mother
Turned away from me
With her “Never minds”
looming over us in silence

Then
My father pulled me to the side
And said
“You better say sorry to your mom.”

And I exhaled
As I thought-
I will always
Make time to hear her
And to help her hear me
I will always
Give room to question
And seek understanding in exchange
I will always
Sit to feel spaces
When she pushes me away
With her words
I will always
Do this
Because
If I began to give no mind
To her
The way she asks
I would not give us the chance
To become closer
To know the humanity of each other
I will always have my mother
In mind
And in heart

I swallowed my pride
Hard
And in silence
I realized I need to let go
I’m just as stubborn as her

I walked to her and say
“I’m sorry”
She says
“Never mind.”

18.Apr.14 11 hours ago

Poem #15 of 30: My Mother Speaks

My mother learned
to twist her tongue
so she might be heard
so she might be seen
so she might be understood
so she might play the part

of a hyphened American

better than a foreigner

Her accent blankets
her ability to be felt
Fully

And I see her seeking spaces
to free her native tongue
to speak
to be whole

“Filipino ba kayo?” And even freer “Ilokano kay kadi?”

At home she
unravels her tongue
in prayer
in song over karaoke

in conversation over mahjong over merienda over the phone Calling back home and she releases
Her tongue In her truth
15.Apr.14 3 days ago
15.Apr.14 3 days ago

Poem #14 of 30: “I Miss You”

You don’t need to
Have distance separate
Your bodies
To miss him
You only need to
Have distance separate
Your spirits

15.Apr.14 3 days ago

Poem #12 of 30: “Seeing Stars”

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Looking up at the city sky
Can feel so empty at night
I almost forget to look upward
because there is just no pull
to lift my eyes above me
How you forget the vastness
of the universe without celestial beings
drawing you toward their divinity

I think about how
Many wishes were lost
for children in the city
With no stars to place them upon
12.Apr.14 6 days ago

Poem #11 of 30: Destined to Meet

The sun
continues gracing
us
with her light.
And I feel warmed with
Gratitude.

To her, to life, to community,
To you
As we move forward in dancing of our spirits in creating and exchange
Under her gaze
Under her glow
And I know the ancestors are smiling at her side
As we have found our way to
Knowing one another in this living

The building and transformation
Has already begun.
And they celebrate in color
And song
And rays of light
As we do.
Reflections of them.

12.Apr.14 6 days ago

Poem 10 of 30: “Universal Language”

Universal Language

The body is
The
Beholder of the universe
Within self
Is all
And in presence
We communicate

Before words
There was movement
Before movement
Breath
Before breath of life
There was the rhythms
Of Mother Earth
Her melodies lived before we did
And she played them
When she herald us into existence
And we make music to her rhythms
With our living

Every mineral
Microscopic
Unseen to the eye
Being
Has it’s own tune
It flows in
In spirit

As human-
We do what we can to
Place word on what we mean
On what we feel
On what we embody
On what we flow and fill in spirit
But word can only do so much
Because it can only speak
What can be discerned
It can only tell the truths of this world
That we know of
That we can name
And we try to manipulate what we are given
In language of cultures,
Of divided lands,
Divided brothers and sisters?
But what of all that lives beyond it?
Of all that lives in every universe
that lives in every being within it?

So much cannot be spoken
But it can be felt
It can be danced to
It can be sat with in silence
In stillness
It can say so much more
Than we can say
In a word-
A sentence
A poem
Language begins with presence
And what you carry in telling
The moment you enter a room

10.Apr.14 1 week ago

Poem #9 of 30: “Hope”

image

I had an amazing session with my students today. It is so beautiful to witness them becoming. No matter how much they struggle through it, I see them wanting it- wanting everything that they know they can create of themselves through their artistry Even if it means them breaking into tears, feeling moments of defeat and calling it out to the universe, feeling heavy- with guidance, they breathe through it, until they begin to find it for themselves. For as long as I can I will remind them of their power. And I will celebrate them each time they rise to show up in all their brilliance.

My students are
My teachers


They are fragments
of the future
Pieces of
possibility
That have not
Fully
Grown
Into all they will
Become
They are our

Hope

I see them

And how their flesh
Looks like our own
Holds stories of our past
Confinements, conflicts, confusions,
In a present world that
We forget
We have created
To break each other
Down
and
Apart
from

Hope

My students
Pick up the broken bits
of our beings
And rebuild mirrors
Toward loving reflection
That show us
What it means
Just
to
Be
Human

Hope

My students
Show me what it looks like
to be more
Free
Than I have even known
And show me the truth
of building
Common unity
for

Hope

And they give us hints
Of our rise
Above the demise
We believe we’ve
Been
Falling under
Losing in

Hope

I pay attention
Because their lessons are
Profound
In the way
They speak
They act
They breathe
They become

Hope

More than
I ever knew
They teach me
There is more
Than today
And it will come
Through
their hands
their minds
their hearts
They will create it
for us

I
Hope
09.Apr.14 1 week ago
09.Apr.14 1 week ago
09.Apr.14 1 week ago
09.Apr.14 1 week ago
09.Apr.14 1 week ago
09.Apr.14 1 week ago